Beached Whale

Look at me!

I am so tired and Girl says mean things like that I am a sea creature trapped on shore!

Girl has no idea how hard I work.

I nearly climbed onto her bed with almost no help.

I also had to find the right position to lay in.

Those are difficult things.

I don't know why Girl insists that she gets space because I am pretty sure I need more beauty sleep.

Bath Day

Oh, Mummy! Girl gave me a bath today and I have become beautiful again! So lovely! So prepared for the world to see my radiance!

Lazy Sunday

Girl: Puggy, you want to go outside?

Me: No.

Girl: But you should go potty.

Me: Zzzzzzzzzz.....

Let's sit outside

Me: Girl, I would like to go outside.

Girl: Okay, we can do that.

Me: I want to sit on the swing.

Girl: Sure.

Me: Girl, please put me back in the house. I don't like this.

Good morning!

Me: Good morning!

Girl: Hello. You're awake finally?

Me: Girl, that is rude. Of course I am awake!

Girl: Puggy, it's lunch time. You made us both stay in bed until after noon o'clock.

Me: Yes.

Girl: So it's not morning anymore.

Me: But it is my morning. Can we have breakfast?

Girl: Okay, I'll get you some dog food. 

Me: I want eggs.

Girl: I don't have time to make you eggs. I have to get going.

Me: I want eggs.

Girl: No. You're getting pug foods.

Me: I want eggs.

Girl: No.

Me: Eggs are pug foods.

Girl: Eggs are not pug foods. Especially not today.

Me: Hey, Girl?

Girl:What?

Me: I want eggs.

So Gangsta

Me: I am so 'hood. Straight gangsta.

Girl: Puggy, you're wearing a hood.

Me: Girl, I know I am in a hood, but I am pretty sure that is how you achieve the title of being so 'hood and gangsta. I might throw gang signs if I can figure out where they sell them. It seems a waste of money to throw them though.

Girl: They don't sell gang signs like they sell old vintage signs. You're a little confused on the concept.

Me: Girl, I am pretty sure I am more experience in this. Drive me to the store, please. Also, please pay for the signs. Also, can we get a burger on the way home? I would like a burger. ...Actually, can we get the burger first, and then get the signs, and then get a burger on the way home?

Feral

Human Girl asked me a question a while back. She said, "Puggy, do you want to be feral?"

I answered," Oh, yes, Girl! I could run about like the beast I am!"

Human Girl laughed because I eat canned food. She commented to Mom that I eat lamb from a can, but in my mind I am actually running the Scottish countryside eating their sheeps.

Girl, this is not in my mind. I am a wild beast.

See the wilderness in my face? See the ferocity in my eyes?

Girl still took my collar off on that day though and never put it back on. Dad puts it on to take me for a walk, but Girl prefers my harness.

Girl, I am feral and you better be aware this means I might eat the kitties.

When they stop being scary.